


Pinky Promise Drabbles

by julemmaes



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas, Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Angst, Domestic Fluff, F/F, F/M, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Light Angst, Love, Love Confessions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:33:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27489637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/julemmaes/pseuds/julemmaes
Summary: This is a collection of short stories about the characters of my Nessian ff, Pinky Promise.They will all be set in the same universe as the main story (which you can find on my profile), but can be read individually and without having read PP.They will mainly focus on Feyre/Rhysand/Tamlin and Elain/Lucien/Azriel, but I will also put parts focused on Varian and Amren and their travels and some episodes between Mor and Manon.
Relationships: Amren/Varian (ACoTaR), Elain Archeron/Azriel, Elain Archeron/Lucien Vanserra, Feyre Archeron/Rhysand, Feyre Archeron/Tamlin, Manon Blackbeak/Morrigan (ACoTaR)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	1. Feysand Chapter 1.5

**Author's Note:**

> What happened in Feyre's room in chapter one

Rhysand was trying in every way to keep himself still between his two brothers. Alcohol was coursing through his veins and his mind was wandering around on its own, in an unknown world.

It had been a relief for him when he remembered that they were all going to eat at the Archeron's house. Whatever they proposed to him that involved seeing Feyre for even a few hours was a treasure.

He was bickering with Elain about something he couldn't even remember, "But only because you don't have enough sisters for backup, otherwise we'd solve it physically," he muttered. Elain laughed and took another sip of her drink.

"I think all three of us would end up with a boner before anyone could tell the winner," Azriel whispered very softly. Cassian burst out laughing shortly afterwards, clinging to him.

He didn't hear the front door open, but he saw everyone turning in the direction of the entrance and tracked the movement as well. He knew it was Feyre, it had to be her.

He only hoped that she had no company.

He stood up, "Yes Fey-Fey join us," Rhysand echoed Mor's words. He was definitely smiling like a child on Christmas morning and hadn't even seen her yet, just a flash of black of her winter coat.

The second she turned towards them, he tensed up.

Her eyes...

"Feyre," he stepped forward, holding his breath, "What happened?"

She was looking at him, but it was as if she didn't see him.

The swollen, red eyes were a clear sign that he had been crying just seconds earlier.

A tinge of hope lit up in his chest and he almost felt sick to his stomach at the idea of having felt pleasure in the suffering of the woman he loved. Regardless of who had caused the wound and what consequences it had had for the relationship between her and Tamlin, Feyre was crying and was not fine.

She moved slowly, without the bit of life that was once an integral part of her person, "Nothing, don't worry," she answered in a small voice.

Nesta was getting up, but Feyre shook her head, raising one hand.

Rhysand couldn't move, he didn't know what to do.

"I didn't want to ruin your evening, I just came to say hi." she smiled slightly at everyone and when no one answered, she bit her lip tentatively. He stiffened even more beside her, now much closer, "I'm sorry... goodnight everyone."

She turned around and walked out of the room, without even sparring him a glance.

He clenched his hands firmly. _What the fuck had just happened?_

He heard the others talking, too loudly for Feyre not to hear them, and he wanted to tell them to be quiet, get up and go to her. She certainly wouldn't let him into her room to comfort her at such an unusual hour. It could have got her into trouble.

That last thought made him even angrier.

Tamlin.

It was inevitably his fault.

Feyre had no one else but him.

Amren appeared equally angered when she said, "Can someone explain what the heck just happened and why no one is going to see how she's doing?"

Rhysand found himself in the hallway before Amren had even finished the sentence. He remembered to knock before he opened the door and when the answer didn't come immediately, he brought a hand to his face, rubbed his eyes and tried to polish his thoughts somewhat.

He knocked a second time, louder, and murmured against the wood, "Darling-"

The door opened wide, causing him to stagger forward and forcing the girl to move aside. Shit, he was too drunk. He looked up once he found some composure, finding Feyre with her arms crossed, " _Don't_ call me that." she pointed to the corridor he had just come from, "And get out of my room."

Rhys sighed, "Feyre, please," he stepped towards her, one hand raised with the intention of touching her.

She drew back, her face impassive, "Please, what?" she asked him, hardening her jaw. He didn't answer and she pointed out again, "Get out."

He shook his head, going towards the door and closing it so that he could lean against it, "What happened?"

Feyre took a deep breath, "What are you doing?"

"I want to understand why you came home crying after a date with your boyfriend," he said harshly.

"I don't recall it ever being any of your business," she replied, sitting on the edge of the bed and leaning forward. Rhysand only realized at that moment how nicely she was dressed.

She had beautiful tight black pants that wrapped her legs perfectly and dark green heels, matched with a blouse of the same color that didn't do justice at all to the shapes he knew hid under it.

He snapped his eyes shut, "I just want to know if you're okay."

Feyre scoffed, "I'm fine," she replied immediately, then looked him in the eye and hers were glossy again, "Now please, get out."

He shook his head, "No," he came closer and she pulled her legs up, settling in the middle of the bed, "You're not fine and I want to know why." She looked over his shoulder, "It's Tamlin, isn't it?"

The sudden burst of anger made Rhysand jerk, "I told you to get out of my room!" cried Feyre, standing on the other side of the bed, putting as much distance between them as possible. "You have to get out!"

"I will not leave this room," he whispered, his gaze determined as he tried to suppress his hatred for anyone who had made her suffer in that way, "because you are not safe and I am worried about you," he said, trying to calm her down.

It seemed to have the opposite result on the girl in front of him, "It's all temporary, Rhysand." she laughed, despite her tear-filled eyes, "This will end too. We just had a fight."

He didn't answer, relieved that she was starting to talk about what happened that night.

Then, all of a sudden, she grew even sadder, "Why do you worry?"

Rhysand frowned, "Because I'm your friend. And I don't want you to suffer."

"That's bullshit." she hissed, "Everything is temporary." she repeated her and he shook his head, disbelief lining his features, "This too." she pointed her chest before pointing at him.

"Stop it."

"Our friendship." she said that word with a grimace across her face, almost as if even just the idea disgusted her, "Everything is temporary." She wouldn't stop saying those words and he wondered if she had had a drink before getting home. "This. This was merely one of those things."

"That's not true." he snapped.

Feyre laughed, she really laughed. "Yes, Rhysand!" she shouted, "We are not friends, you and I."

"This. This was merely one of those things."

"That's not true." he snapped.

Feyre laughed, she really laughed. "Yes, Rhysand!" he shouted, "We are not friends, you and I."

He wanted to agree with her, but imagined that they both me and you mean two completely opposite things. He could hear the blood rumbling in his ears.

"I'm with Tamlin." she whispered and a tear slipped down her cheek, "I'm with him and you're no one to me." he recoiled at those words, as if she had physically hit him.

"Why are you doing this?" he asked, swallowing, "If you'd let me-".

"I don't have to let you do anything!" she cried, "I don't need your help or anyone else's! I am fine on my own!" her voice grew louder with every word.

Rhysand pushed himself forward until he touched the mattress with his knees, "Clearly that's not the case!" he yelled in turn, "You need help and I'm here! I'm offering you-"

She interrupted him, going around the room and putting her hands against his chest, "Get out! Leave!" she pushed him against the door, and when he heard someone walking in the corridor, he looked at Feyre, who was now crying. He nodded his head once and then walked out of the room, crashing into Azriel and storming out of the apartment.

He heard Feyre swearing and screaming and he slammed the door behind him. He was coming down the stairs furiously when he heard it open again and sped up the pace, not wanting to see who it was.

As soon as he was out in the fresh air, he slipped his hand into his pocket, pulling out the cigarette packet.

He was not a heavy smoker, but sometimes the school and the children overwhelmed him and he had to find a way to relax. One cigarette a week seemed to do it for him.

He breathed in full lungs and held the smoke in for a few seconds, turning around when he heard the front door of the building close.

Azriel was standing in front of him, hands in his pockets and a serious expression on his face.

He offered him the package and his brother shook his head, frowning, "No, thank you." he murmured, "And you shouldn't smoke either."

Rhysand chuckled, "Feyre just told me we're not friends." he looked like a little kid, "She just told me I'm nobody to her." he whispered, looking down the street.

He could feel Azriel's gaze on his skin.

"Did you find out what happened?" he asked him, making a little cloud with his breath.

He felt guilty for forcing the other one to follow him outside, in this freezing cold.

He shook his head, taking another puff, "Nothing," he answered, then passed his hand over his face. "I shouldn't have gone into her room," he sighed, "I shouldn't have invaded her space like that."

Azriel put his hand on his shoulder, "You did nothing wrong, Rhys."

"How can you say that when all I did tonight was make things worse?" he asked in a pleading tone.

"Because Feyre needs someone to make her understand that this is no life." he saw it in Azriel's eyes that even his brother wanted to take the car and go to the asshole's house to make him pay for every wrong he had done to Feyre.

He said nothing, still too tipsy to face this conversation without going crazy.

"He's a piece of shit and he doesn't deserve her," murmured Rhys.

Azriel smirked, "That's what Elain said."


	2. Feysand Chapter 3.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhysand struggles upon seeing Feyre arguing with Tamlin and is left with a lot of questions when she basically runs away from him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly hate Tamlin so fucking much.

They were fighting.

He hadn't immediately realized who the two people in the car in the opposite lane were, but when the girl turned to the man, Rhysand's breath stuck in his throat.

A half thought of getting off his car in the middle of the crossroad while the traffic light was still red, just so he could throw a punch at Tamlin, crossed his mind.

How could they fight so often?

Feyre was waving her hands in the air and he could hear the screams, but he didn't understand what they were talking about. Tamlin looked livid with rage and was gripping the steering wheel so tightly with his fingers that Rhysand feared for a second that he would rip it off the trunk and throw it through the windshield glass.

Suddenly he screamed and although Rhys was on the other side of the road, he could still see Feyre wince and carry her arms to her chest. Tamlin had turned towards her and was screaming so loud that even the people on the sidewalk had stopped to see what was going on.

Someone behind him honked and he had to take a deep breath to get away from that scene and drive to his house.

He hadn't stopped thinking for a second about the terrified air that Feyre had taken on when Tamlin blew up with her and he really wanted to go back and carry her along. He would have never hit her boyfriend.

The desire for such an act was there, always persistent, but out of respect for Feyre he would never intrude so much into her relationship.

At the sixth red light that he found he swore out loud, cursing himself for not taking the freeway. He had stayed in school until dark, hoping to focus more on work and not on the fact that the girl he loved had told him that there was not even a friendship between them.

Rhysand knew she had been wrong. She knew that when things got really bad, she could always go to him and he would welcome her with open arms. Not because he could take advantage of the opportunity, but because that's what friends did. And he himself had turned to her when his father died and he didn't know how to feel.

She had helped him so much.

Seeing another traffic light that was about to go red, he turned left, deciding to take another road. He was just a short distance from his home when he got stuck in traffic again.

"I can't believe it," he murmured, resting his forehead on the steering wheel.

The cars in front of him all started honking and it wasn't long before the one behind him joined in the mess. Someone must have had an accident further down the road because it was unlikely that there was a traffic jam at this point in the city.

He turned on the radio in an attempt to distract himself from the image of Tamlin screaming in Feyre's face.

This proved rather pointless when a flicker of blond hair caught his attention.

The couple was walking hand in hand on the sidewalk, both smiling as if they had just discovered the solution to world peace. She leaned completely on him, his arm wrapped around her shoulders.

He bent down and whispered something to her ear and Rhysand felt the world collapse beneath his feet.

That was not normal.

Rhysand frowned, puffing irritated before he opened his eyes wide to the blinding beauty of Feyre. He blinked a couple of times, not believing what he was seeing.

She was wearing a long, elegant, dark-colored dress with glitter and sparkling diamonds that shone every time they passed under a streetlight. He didn't know how she could stay with her upper half so exposed, considering the low temperature and the frost that entered your veins, but he assumed that after a fight like theirs, the cold was the least of her thoughts. The loose hair on her shoulders had to provide at least a little warmth.

Her corset was completely wrapped, leaving little to the imagination, and the long sleeves embraced her arms perfectly. She was _perfect_.

Perfect, and yet...

She looked so thin next to Tamlin's massive figure.

They had stopped in front of a fancy restaurant and now he was holding her by the waist, squeezing her against him. Feyre smiled at him and Rhysand could hear the sound of his heart ripping a little more.

He saw him mouth "I love you" and then they kissed.

Rhysand had to look away.

When the line of cars started to flow forward, he didn't know if it relieved him or angered him even more. He wanted to admire Feyre for a few more minutes, but he couldn't stand the sight of Tamlin hugging and kissing her when he wasn't even supposed to be by her side.

He got to his house in a few minutes and never thought he would find Nesta standing in their kitchen. He had tried to tell them that he could go out again and find something else to do, but the girl had been more than clear that she no longer wanted to be in the same room with Cassian.

He had looked at his brother, wondering how he could live with himself.

How could he be so blind that he didn't realize that already having the woman of your dreams being yours, in every possible way, was the most precious thing a man could ask for?

Nesta, despite their rocky relationship, didn't deserve this situation.

***

When he woke up that morning to go for a run, he didn't think he'd meet anyone. Being a Sunday morning, all his friends and colleagues were certainly enjoying the day off to rest and his brothers were still sleeping when he had left.

He wouldn't risk bumping into any of his students' parents because he knew perfectly well that they didn't live in that neighborhood and had decided to go out without his "antisocial-headphones". He only ran with music when he was terrified of running into someone and that he would be forced to engage in a conversation.

And maybe today it wouldn't have been a bad idea because Feyre was standing in front of a store window with such a concentrated gaze that if he hadn't known her, he would have thought she was one of those fools in town.

The other issue, the bigger one, was that Rhysand knew exactly what store that was. He would pass by it every day on his way to work. Every step that brought him closer to her felt more challenging than the previous one and he noticed with no small disappointment that she was not looking at the bridesmaid's dresses.

The bridal gowns shone in the sunlight of Velaris.

Closing his eyes and hoping that she wouldn't notice him, Rhysand passed behind her slowing down a bit, trying not to swat her.

He was about to thank whoever was watching over him when he heard her voice calling out to him.

He stopped abruptly, cursing under his voice and turning slowly.

She was smiling at him as she had smiled at Tamlin the night before and he gasped for breath.

He took two steps forward and then they found themselves standing next to each other, both looking at the wedding dresses displayed in the window.

"Hey." she whispered.

Rhys felt the urge to laugh, "Hey."

She turned to him a little bit, "How's it going?"

"The usual, I went out for a run." he shrugged, wheezing.

Feyre nodded, looking thoughtful.

He didn't know what to do. He didn't want to ask her why the hell she was looking at stupid gowns, because his question would be just as stupid and he was terrified to look down at her left hand and see a shiny ring with a diamond.

He wanted her to tell him that she was just checking them for a friend, that Alis or Ressina had been proposed by their respective guys and that she was waiting for them.

He wanted her to tell him anything except that Tamlin had asked her to marry him.

"I have to apologize for the other night," she suddenly said.

He took one hand forward, stepping back, "No, you don't," he replied, "I should have minded my own business and left you alone when you said you wanted to be alone. I'm sorry for invading your privacy."

Feyre looked at him, blinking a couple of times, looking like she couldn't grab his words. She opened her mouth to talk, but no sound came out.

Rhysand scratched the back of his head and smiled, noticing only at that moment the gray overalls, stained with paint and the oversized jacket. She was impeccable even after a night out, dressed so casually. Thinking about the night before and how stunning she had looked, he decided to tempt fate and say, "I saw you last night, in the car."

She stiffened and her eyes snapped to him. He saw the panic imprinted in her features and immediately understood what she was thinking. The one time she had openly told him about her relationship, in a drunken haze, she confessed to him that she hated it when others saw them arguing.

"I mean, I was in the car, you were on the sidewalk with Tamlin." he hurried to clarify.

He saw her visibly relax and release a trembling breath.

She nodded, smiling shyly, still shaken at the idea that he had seen them fight, "Yes, Tam decided to celebrate his birthday a few days earlier and last night we went out with friends." she explained, looking back at the white dresses.

He didn't know what he was doing when, glancing at her face, he murmured, "You looked beautiful."

She blushed, bowing her head a little, "Thank you," she hesitantly said.

She didn't look him in the eye and Rhysand just wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake her until she realized she deserved better.

He looked at his watch on his wrist and shook his head. He had to go home and print things for his children. He didn't want to leave her there, though.

Feyre interrupted his thoughts, turning to him and taking a few steps back, "I really have to go," she said, grimacing, "see you tonight at Mor." she quipped.

Rhys nodded, throwing a smile at her.

He had just taken a step in the opposite direction when he heard her call again.

Feyre was staring at him agitated, "I am sorry. I didn't mean any of the things I said to you the other night."

He was shocked.

"You-" she seemed to choke on her words, "You and I are friends. I hope you know that."

He knew it.

She didn't give him the time to reply that she had already crossed the street.

***

Feyre bit her lip swearing at herself.

"You look hot as fuck." Tamlin had told her as soon as he saw her, "Seriously, sexiest thing you've ever worn, baby girl."

She had thanked him, sincerely happy to hear a compliment instead of the usual passive aggressive comments he always made about her loose, sporty clothes. The ones she normally used when she was painting or studying.

Rhysand had called her beautiful instead.

_Beautiful._

She repeated the word out loud as she ran her eyes over the various shades of purple on the shelf, rolling her tongue around each letter.

Tamlin hadn't called her beautiful for years now.

She smiled when she found the perfect shade in the dark blues to paint the sky of a starry night in one of her paintings, and as she paid, it was almost as if she hadn't noticed that that color was the exact twin of the eyes of the man she had just left on the sidewalk.


	3. Elucien Chapter 5.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it possible for me to write “I fucking hate Tamlin so much I swear.” at the beginning of each drabble I post? Cause OH MY GOD MY HATRED FOR THIS MAN HAS NO LIMIT.
> 
> This is what happens to the other couples involved in the story, the same night Cassian and Nesta fight at the end of chapter five (which, if you missed, I posted yesterday). I’ll probably end up posting the Feylin pov’s either tonight or tomorrow, cause this part is pretty important for our sweet and dear Feysand.
> 
> Enjoy!:)

Elain felt Lucien's eyes on the side of her face as if he were touching her.

They had just got into the car, after being at Tamlin's for his birthday. He had already celebrated last weekend, but Feyre had invited them to her boyfriend's house because she didn't want him to spend the day he was actually born all alone brooding on his couch.

They had had fun in the beginning, as they had been doing for ten years now, but things had gotten out of hand when Feyre had started to be a little too high on booze and Tamlin had gotten angry.

When she could no longer stand that ghostly touch of fire on her cheek, she snapped, "Stop starring at me." she kept her gaze fixed on the road ahead of her as Lucien drove through the traffic in Velaris.

She caught a glimpse of him as he ran his hand through his loose hair, sighing in frustration, "I'll stop looking at you if you tell me what the problem is."

She had to try her best to remain calm, "You know very well what the problem is."

"Lainy-" he huffed.

She shot her head at him, "Don't you _Lainy_ me."

Lucien turned to her, looking at her with a tight expression, "C'mon, she was just too drunk."

"That has nothing to do with what happened." Elain gritted out, "And you backed him up." she said in a sharp voice, as she crossed her arms on her chest, still unable to believe what had just happened.

_Elain was trying to have fun but it had been months since she felt the slightest urge to go out with her little group of high school friends, now reduced to just her and her sister plus their respective boyfriends. Every person who had abandoned them over the years moved further and further away from her every time she mentioned those in her close circle._

_All night she had been trying to lean on Lucien, to find affection in the physical contact he was normally so willing to give her, yet he seemed to move away every time she tried to touch his arm, to leave a kiss on his lips, on his cheek._

_Feyre was positively drunk and they were playing poker, a dangerous game, if you asked Elain. They hadn't played for so long, but she still remembered perfectly all the times they had done it. All the times Tamlin had taken advantage of his skill and emptied everyone's pockets. All the times they had played a slightly hotter and sexier version of the game and it was always over with him hitting anyone who tried to watch Feyre._

_His little sister had proposed just that that night and Elain could already see the wrath in Tamlin's eyes._

Lucien shrugged, turning right towards his house, "Cause it was her fault."

Elain brought her hands to her face, rubbing her cheeks, taking a deep breath, "I swear that if you blame my sister one more time" she murmured, suggesting how angry she really was at that moment.

Her boyfriend immediately got on the defensive, "I'm not trying to blame Feyre. "

She looked at him with a confused grimace on her face, "You literally just said it was her fault."

"I'm just saying that she could have behaved differently," Lucien pointed out, looking at her starkly.

_Feyre burst out laughing, pushing all her chips to the center of the table and uncovering the cards. Tamlin grunted next to her, "You lost again."_

_Elain giggled, taking a sip of wine, "You have to take your shirt off."_

_Lucien glanced at her and then huffed the air out of his nose, "We can just play with money, we don't have to -" seeing the murderous look his best friend gave him, he grew small on the chair, mumbling the end of the sentence._

_Feyre laughed louder, grabbing the edge of her tank top and pulling it up to her chin, uncovering her breasts covered by a simple black sports bra. Lucien immediately looked away, certainly exposing, but she and Elain broke out laughing._

_"Okay, that's enough." Tamlin grumbled._

Elain opened her eyes wide, looking astonished, "Do you even hear yourself?"

Lucien raised an eyebrow, "What?"

" _Could've behaved differently?_ " she repeated, imitating his voice. Then she shook her head, bringing her attention back to the road, "No, fuck you."

"Elain, you're acting like a child," he huffed, running a hand through his hair again.

She replied in an irritated tone, "And to me, it seems like you're trying so hard to be Tamlin. And it disgusts me."

He looked at her surprised, "You- I'm not-"

"Yes, you are." she murmured, "And what's worst is that you don't even do that on purpose anymore. You do that so you feel accepted and so that he keeps you under his wing." she snapped, realizing too late that what she had said would provoke such a reaction in Lucien, who closed his mouth and clutched the steering wheel in his hands, remaining silent.

Elain noticed that she had hit a weak spot and felt guilty, "I'm sorry, Luce."

He waved a hand in between them, "Don't be." he whispered in a softer voice, "I was being a douche."

She smiled slightly, "Keep talking." prompting him to continue, "I like where this is going."

"Stop it." he jokingly told her, addressing her with a half smile. She put her hand on his leg, squeezing his thigh. He placed his hand on hers, intertwining their fingers.

"I just don't understand how you can think that what Tamlin does is right," said Elain, in a calmer voice, looking for his gaze, "You'd never treat me that way."

_"Then just strip naked and do a lap dance for Lucien while you're at it." Tamlin shouted._

_Feyre looked at him with her eyes wide open, before bursting out laughing with tears in her eyes. Elain had covered her mouth with her hand so as not to spit out all the wine on the table, but it had proved impossible when Feyre had mocked Tamlin, turning to Lucien, "If you move off the table, I can straddle you."_

_Her boyfriend had been too embarrassed to even say no and had just sat there staring at Feyre. Tamlin had grabbed her by the arm and had made her stand up, eliciting a cry of pain from her sister._

_Elain had immediately stopped laughing and stood up in turn, followed by Lucien, who had finally put his hand around her waist. Not because he wanted to, she noticed a little later, but because she had taken a step towards the couple and he was trying to stop her._

_"You're pissing me off." Tamlin snarled, taking Feyre's clothes and pulling her towards his bedroom._

_Elain had tried to talk, to tell him to leave her alone, that everyone was having a good time, but Lucien had blocked her and told her that maybe they should have left._

_By the time they got out of the apartment, the screaming had started and Elain could not say who was yelling the loudest._

Lucien spoke very quietly, but there was a hint of amusent there, "No, I wouldn't dare." he said as if he was afraid of how she would react if he even tried to treat her that way.

Elain felt the hairs on her neck rise, "That's not the point," she specified, "even if I was defenceless you'd never do that." she snatched her hand from his leg, carrying it between her thighs to warm up, "That's lack of respect at its best and I'm worried for Feyre."

"Something happened?"

"You know it did. Last week." she pointed it out to him. When he still seemed confused, she said, "When you called me and we fought over the phone." understanding lit Lucien's eyes, who nodded slightly, "See? You can't even remember it because it happens so often we don't even keep count."

"I think he was right." he asserted, "He told me she was flirting with some other guy."

Elain couldn't understand if he was doing it on purpose to make her angry, "And you believe him because?"

"Because he's my best friend and she always does things like that." he said it as if Feyre's behavior was something repulsive.

"I'll overlook the fact that you just offended my sister," she whispered threateningly, "but you shouldn't believe everything Tamlin tells you."

He looked at her, snorting, "Why shouldn't I?" he asked, sincerely curious to know her motives, "He's always been by her side and helped her with everything in recent years, the least she could do is do the little he asks of her."

There were so many wrong things in what Lucien had just said.

"Because that's the way he is." Elain exclaimed exasperatedly, "He gives you everything without asking you for anything in return and then after a while he expects you to treat him like a god." she clenched her fists on her legs, "Plus, he's studying law, he's doing of his best _quality_ ," she uttered that word with indignation, implying that it was absolutely not a good quality, but quite the opposite, "the perfect job."

Her boyfriend did not answer, as they stopped at a traffic light and tied his hair in a high ponytail, so she continued, driven by her hatred for the blond man that Lucien seemed to idolize so much, "He is literally studying to lie so successfully that he can free murderers and impostors."

"Don't make it sounds bad. I'm studying law too." he pointed out to her.

Elain chuckled, "First, you are studying environmental law, love," she stroked his face briefly, "you want to save animals." he smiled at her, looking at her tirelessly. "Second, do you really believe that everything Tamlin says is the truth? Because I know that he can twist anything to his heart's content. He has done it several times with you, too."

Lucien huffed, rubbing his hand over his face and touching her nose with his fingertip, "Listen I really don't want their fucked up relationship to intervene in ours, fine?" then looked her in the eyes and smiled lovingly, sighing, "I love you Elain and-".

The words were out before she could stop them, "You do?"

His expression changed completely and he blinked quickly, taken aback, "Of course I do, what are you talking about?"

Elain frowned, "Nothing, I was just," she shook her head, shutting her eyes and turning towards the window, "Sorry, I'm a little bit tipsy too."

There were moments of silence, then Lucien whispered, "And we fight everytime they do."

"Yeah, cause you say stuff like that." perhaps she had used a too rough tone because Lucien made a frustrated sound that echoed in the cockpit.

"This is why I don't want to talk about it." his eyes were wide open and he seemed on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

"So you're suggesting we stop talking about serious things because we see them in a different way?" she drawled, irked as a little kitten, "Yeah, that sounds very healthy."

"I'm trying to make things work here." he said, looking over at her.

She scoffed, "Maybe they shouldn't if you think this is the right way to do it."

Everything seemed to come to a halt, "What do you mean?" he stammered.

"Nothing." Elain hurried to say, puffing and creating a cloud of steam with her breath.

She had never felt him as insecure as she did in that moment when he asked, "You wanna break up with me?"

She looked at him immediately, shaking her head frantically, "No, baby, I really don't." and that was the truth, "I'm just exhausted and Tamlin pushed me over the edge."

Lucien didn't seem so convinced as he finally parked in front of his building, but he nodded once, before looking intensely into her eyes, "You know I love you, right?"

She gave him the brightest smile she could before she whispered, "Yes, I know."

She leaned toward his seat, putting her hand behind the back of his head to pull him to her. Lucien closed his eyes as Elain took control of that kiss. She opened her lips slightly and their tongues entwined.

When they were both panting for air, Lucien bit her lower lip, murmuring against her mouth, "Do you wanna watch a movie?"

Elain kissed him again, longing for everything he could give her, "I'd rather do other things, actually."

"Mh," he put his hand on her thigh, caressing his way up to her hip, "like what?"

Elain was far faster than him to reach his hottest part, palming him through his jeans, "Like this?"

He smirked, moaning when she pushed a little harder, "I like the idea."


	4. Feylin Chapter 5.5.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I fucking hate Tamlin so much, I swear.
> 
> This is what happened when Elain and Lucien left Tamlin’s place the night of his birthday. There’s a very short Nessian appearance at the end, which kinda warmed my heart but TW FOR ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE for this one. If you’re sensitive when it comes to these things, you might not wanna read it.

Feyre had no idea what was going on until Tamlin slammed the door of his room behind her, almost hitting her head in the process. She tore her arm out of his binding grip, giggling, "Are you serious right now?" she asked while her boyfriend threw her shirt at her chest. She staggered backwards, not so much for the force of the gesture, but more for the surprise.

Tamlin didn't seem to like the joking tone she had used so much, because he erupted, "You're asking me if I'm serious?!"

Feyre stepped toward the wall, leaning with her shoulder against the bricks for support. She just had to let him yell for a few minutes and then she could apologize to him. Maybe if she played her cards right, he wouldn't even stay angry for too long, so she could get something out of it too.

Maybe she wouldn't come, as she hadn't come in the last years of their relationship, but at least she would have had fun and felt something. And he's leave her alone for a while after that.

The man swelled his chest, dragging his hands up, "You were getting naked in front of Lucien!"

She shrugged, slurring her words, "It's a stupid game, Tam. I wouldn't have gotten so far as to get butt naked in front of him." And then, smiling amidst all that alcohol, she added, "I have some respect for myself, you know."

Tamlin contracted his jaw, "Do you even know what that word means?" a vein popped off on his forehead and Feyre had to control herself so as not to burst out laughing in his face. All that wine was coming up to her head way faster than anticipated, so much that she didn't realize what was going on around her. Tamlin took a step towards her, his eyes lit up with anger, "Cause it certainly doesn't seem like it to me. You definitely have zero for our relationship! For me!"

She snorted, shaking her head, "That's not true."

He opened his eyes wide, clenching his fists, "Oh, so it's completely normal to humiliate me in front of everyone-"

"Everyone?" she interjected him.

Tamlin moved so fast that Feyre didn't even notice how close he'd got until she felt a strong pressure on her right forearm and, looking down, saw his hand squeeze her naked skin. He got close enough, that when he spoke, Feyre smelled the alcohol in his breath, "Don't. Interrupt me."

She tried to free herself from his grip, tugging at his arm, but he didn't let go. "Let me go." she seethed, and whatever Tamlin saw on her face convinced him to lift one finger at a time. Her hand snapped on the sore spot, massaging it, "There were literally only three people in the room. One of them was you, who see me naked every single day, another was Elain, with whom I still shower sometimes, and Lucien. Fucking Lucien, Tam," she said.

He squinted his eyes, "Then I'm supposed to accept the fact that you wanna be a whore in front of him, just cause you've known him your whole life?" he fumed, pacing back and forth, while looking her straight in the eyes.

Feyre didn't believe her ears and pushed herself off the wall, opening her mouth and closing it several times, "A _whore_!?" she gasped, "This isn't any different than going to the beach and wearing a bikini in front of him."

Tamlin laughed, bewildered, "Now you wanna do that too?" he shouted. He pointed at her and stopped in the middle of the room. He looked her in the eye with an angry expression, handing himself on the face, "God, you're driving me crazy.

"I've never said that." Feyre was also getting angry and slowly, her dream of being able to turn the evening around at her own convenience was getting further and further away, "And you don't get to yell at me like this. You owe me an apology." she demanded, crossing her arms on her chest and biting the inside of her cheek.

Tamlin burst out laughing. Sincere laughter. He left the room, returning to the kitchen. Feyre followed him with her mouth wide open, her arms dangling against her hips as she tried to keep her balance.

_God, how much had she drunk?_

She saw him pour himself a glass of wine and when he looked at her, with that stupid idiot smile that she hated so much, Feyre leaned her hips against the table, nodding her chin to make him talk.

He scoffed, stunned, "You're not joking."

"No, I'm not joking Tamlin!" she exclaimed, feeling the nervousness floating in her veins while a wave of dizziness forced her to close her eyes. Then she raised her voice more, trying to prove her point, "You just called me a whore. I won't let that pass."

Tamlin did not seem to like the memo of what had just happened and he also screamed, making two stride in her direction and bending forward, until he was at eye-level, "Because you were acting like one!"

Feyre drifted away, struggling to breathe, "I was playing a stupid fucking game."

He groaned, clenching his first tight around his glass, "Still you-" he opened his arms as he snapped, slamming on the edge of the table violently, shattering the glass in his hand. Feyre took one hand to her mouth, startled, when Tamlin screamed, " _Fuck!_ "

She bent down on her knees, the fog of alcohol that had clouded her vision until then slowly dissipating. She was about to grab one of the biggest pieces of glass when she heard him grunting in pain.Her gaze sprang upwards, toward his face, twisted in a grimace, "Tamlin..."

He hit her hand with the tip of his shoe, "Leave it."

Feyre shook her head, resuming to pick up the pieces of the glass, while she felt tears forming in the corners of her eyes. Willing her voice to sound steady, she murmured, "I'm gonna clean that up."

"I SAID LEAVE IT!"

The burst of anger frightened her so much that she pulled herself up off the ground immediately. Standing in front of him, she could see him squeezing what was left of the glass in the palm of his hand. "Please, just put it down. You're gonna hurt yourself." she whispered, with one hand on her chest and one outstretched towards him.

He snapped forward, clutching the glass between his fingers, letting the glass tear the skin and the blood flow freely. "SEE?! THIS IS WHAT YOU TO ME!" he screamed, pushing his red, dripping hand toward her. Feyre stepped back, suppressing a hiccup. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT. YOU MAKE ME LOSE MY MIND AND THEN I DO SHIT LIKE THIS AND I HURT MYSELF BECAUSE YOU'RE SO FULL OF YOURSELF YOU CAN'T EVEN SEE YOU'RE HARMING OTHER PEOPLE."

Then, the dam that had blocked the crying until that moment, collapsed and her vision fogged up again, "Please Tam, I love you. Just put it down and I'll clean up."

She took a hesitant step towards him, taking his bloody hand between hers and spreading his fingers one by one. She led him toward the kitchen sink, as his labored breath echoed in her ears, "Stop crying." he ordered.

And she tried, she really tried. And when a loud hiccup burst from her lips as she scratched the blood from his fingernails, Tamlin puffed and shoved her with the hip, pushing her away from him.

She wrapped herself with her arms, not realizing that she was getting blood on her bare skin.

Tamlin turned towards her, turning off the faucet and taking a deep breath, "Feyre you need to understand that we're two in this relationship and you can't do whatever you feel like doing whenever you want. You need to show me some respect."

She nodded faintly, closing her eyes slightly, "I know, I'm sorry."

He looked at her with such intensity, that Feyre's knees almost gave out beneath her when he said, "You need to leave."

Her hands fell down on her hips, thinking she misunderstood, "What?"

"Go home, I need to be alone."

She knew he wasn't kidding. That when he said he wanted to be alone, she shouldn't interfere.

Whispering, with fear about the reaction she might provoke in him, "I don't have any money." She hadn't brought any cash with her and taking a cab from here to her home would have cost her more than twenty euros.

He did not answer her, but went to his room and came back with her shirt in his hand. He didn't even look at her while picking up the sweater she'd taken off during the poker game and threw it all back at her, saying, "You drove here."

"Tamlin," she said baffled, "I'm drunk."

He swirled around, threateningly closing in and pushing his forehead against hers, "I don't care!"

Feyre emitted a frightened sound as she closed her eyes, holding her breath as she waited for him to hit her - to release all that pent-up anger on her and raise that open hand to crush it against her cheek. She only opened her eyes again when Tamlin pulled away, suddenly looking tired, pointing to the door of his apartment, "Just get out of my house."

Feyre quickly put on her clothes, feeling a vague pain in her arm as she lifted it to let the shirt slip on her, and shook her head, trying to talk some sense into him. If she had stayed there, if she could convince him to let her stay, she could have done something for him to make it up to him. She put her hand on his back, trying to calm him down, "Tamlin please, it's freezing outside and-"

He interrupted her, hitting her arm and striding towards his room, without even looking her way, "Feyre get the fuck out of my house."

And Feyre did. She winced at the sound of his bedroom door slamming, but she swallowed her tears and headed towards the exit in silence. She passed by the mess of glass and wine on the floor and sighed trembling, bending over and picking up every piece, drying the floor and the table, scratching away the blood from the cracks in the parquet wood and making sure there was nothing left, no evidence of what had happened.

She looked back one last time, before grabbing her bag and her jacket and going down the endless stairs to the parking lot, where her very-old-mini-two-seater car was waiting for her. She sat down, taking the steering wheel in her hands and forming white clouds with each breath taken. She giggled at that sight and then burst into tears, her body shaken by violent sobs that prevented her from breathing properly.

It was all her fault, she knew.

If only she hadn't drunk so much.

If only she hadn't thought that playing strip poker was a good idea.

She had ruined the evening for everyone.

Tamlin was right. She had upset and disappointed him. And someone had ended up getting hurt.

***

She woke up from the cold, almost three hours later. Looking at the clock on the radio she saw that it was shortly after two o'clock in the morning.

She sat up, grunting when a twinge of pain ran through her entire body. Her back creaked when she stretched and she cursed, feeling the cold pierce her skin. Sleeping in the car had not been the best idea, but the only other option would have been to seek shelter at the boys' house and at that moment Feyre could not even imagine how Azriel and Rhysand would have reacted if she had shown up at their house in the middle of the evening.

Frustrated, she tried to push the button to turn on the heat for the millionth time, finding it still not working. She clenched her fists, feeling her finger joints screaming in pain.

At least now she was no longer drunk and could drive. She rearranged the seat so that it was in the sitting position and started the car, heading towards home.

As soon as she was in the stairwell, the heat there was enough to make her teeth stop chattering and her legs stop shaking. She went up as fast as her frozen knees would allow and thanked her sister Nesta, when she entered the apartment, for keeping the heat on all day.

This fall, Velaris was doing her very best to show just how cold she could get.

She tiptoed to her room and felt her stomach twitch when she walked past Elain's and saw it empty. She was about to enter the bathroom adjacent to her room when she saw movements at the end of the corridor and noticed that the door to Nesta's room was open.

As she approached to close it, she was able to distinguish two figures lying on the bed above the blankets.

Cassian was holding Nesta close to his chest, one hand in her hair and the other around her waist. Legs intertwined with the other's. Her sister kept her arms at her chest, between her and Cassian, but Feyre had never seen her sleep so relaxed in all her life.

A twinge in her heart made her take an abrupt breath.

It must have been louder than she thought, because Cassian moved on the bed and opened his eyes wide, spotting her at the end of the bed, "Jesus Christ Feyre."

Nesta moved next to him, only to push her face even further against his chest. Cassian's gaze shifted to the woman crouching over him and the hand he held in her hair slid lower, surrounding her back with both arms to hold her tighter.

He looked back at Feyre with weary eyes, raising an eyebrow lazily. The girl brought her hands to her mouth, trying not to talk too loud, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to wake you up."

He shook his head to make her understand that it wasn't a problem, then asked her, "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, um..." Feyre didn't know if he was referring to the fact that she was there in the middle of Nesta's room watching them sleep like a freak or the fact that she was back home when she was actually supposed to stay at Tamlin's for the night.

He must have sensed something was wrong, because his next question was, "Are you okay?"

Was she okay? No, at that moment she was the furthest thing from okay that could exist, but she looked at the couple in front of her and smiled, thinking that if they could get through their fights, why should she and Tamlin be any different?

She was quick to answer, "Yeah, yeah, just a little hangover."

Cassian frowned, "What time is it?"

She shook her hand mid-air and gave him a shy smile, "Go back to sleep, Cass."

He sighed, slumped again and murmured a slight, " _Yessir._ "

She snorted and closed the door to the room, looking forward to the time when she and Tamlin would also come to peace and she could finally relax in the arms of the man she loved.


End file.
